Welcome To Beldon Hall, My Perverts!

BeldonHall

Look at what we have here, my lovely Perverts! I’d like to say I kept this one close to the chest because I wanted it to be a lovely Halloween surprise. That was a very large factor but I’ve also been stupid busy. Something happens toward the end of September, the rest of the year seems to roll end over end down the hill in its hurry to land in a jumbled but glowing mess at the bottom of the year. We weren’t sure how or when we’d publish The Madmen of Beldon Hall, we didn’t even have a cover until about twelve hours ago. But I was inspired to try something totally different because I’m a nerd and Halloween is my favorite after Thanksgiving. All the carbs are there and my body is approximately 50% gravy.

I was just setting out on what probably would have been a sinker when a darker, twistier story started to peck at the back of my brain. I’m not immune to the siren call of the Halloween costume and candy explosion at Target, I see a sequined covered skull or a sexy pumpkin and I’m in the mood for Poe and Brontë. And I’d recently rewatched Rebecca and I wanted my own Manderley. “Oh, shit. I’m about to give you Gay Gothic, for your nerves,” I decided and that’s exactly what we did.

This one is intensely dark, at its core. I couldn’t publish it without including a warning. But there’s also so much light, laughter and glorious gay sex. I’m still me and you know I can’t keep a straight face for more than a moment and it has to feel good. If you’ve longed for a Gothic Romance featuring a brooding earl and donkey punching, holy shit, I’ve totally delivered.

I’m not giving you a large, super naughty excerpt this time. I’m giving you my very favorite chapter. It’s short and gives absolutely nothing away. Deal with it:

 

“I’d love you to love me! I’m begging you to beg me! I want you to want meeee!” Byron sang loudly and Alastair’s cheeks puffed out as he leaned against the bathroom door and girded things. Mornings were both the highlight of Alastair’s day and an exquisitely painful battery of tortures.

It usually began with the singing. It was always the same song and Alastair would never hear it and not get a semi. He loved Byron’s voice and he was energetic and optimistic as he danced and pouted in front of the mirror as he shaved. And he was so adorably sincere as he begged to be loved as he brushed his teeth or sang into his hairbrush. Alastair ached to pull him into his arms and spin him around the bathroom as he sang at the top of his lungs but he felt too damaged and dark. He couldn’t imagine holding something so bright and joyful in his hands and not breaking it.

“Oh, didn’t I, didn’t I, didn’t I see you cryin’?”

There were times when Alastair genuinely wanted to cry. Byron wasn’t the least bit shy. His casual locker room attitude was killing Alastair. He’d hop and wiggle his ass as he sang and the most Alastair could ever hope for was a pair of boxers. Or not hope for. A hysterical laugh burst from his throat and he pinched the bridge of his nose. He was never sure if he was disappointed or relieved whenever Byron put on his boxers but they only made it slightly easier for Alastair to breathe.

And the touching! His fingers would trail down Alastair’s spine before he reached around him for the toothpaste or he’d pull him against his chest briefly as they passed each other at the sink. He was always teasing and playful but he was ruthless and brazen in the bathroom. Alastair loved it and as painful as the rest of his day would be, he sprinted out of bed every morning as soon as his eyes opened because he didn’t want to miss a minute of it.

“Feelin’ all alone without a friend, you know you feel like dyin!”

For the first time in his life, Alastair wasn’t alone. He was starting to suspect he might be happy, for the first time as well.

“I’d love you to love me,” Alastair whispered then took a deep breath and opened the door.

 

The Madmen of Beldon Hall is available on Amazon!

http://amzn.to/2gEiwNr

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Welcome To Beldon Hall, My Perverts!

New! Lavender’s Back And He’s Gayer And More Dangerous Than Ever.

My Pervy Reader,

Book #30 had to be special. It had to be a big deal. I had to bring back my Lake Cliff boys. Bleed And Seek is special and it’s a very big deal. It’s full of sex, danger and love. And laughter. We’ll always find time to laugh. Life is not as it seems in Lake Cliff and secrets, lies and time have a way of catching up with us in the end.

BleedAndKeep

 

Wondering what Lavender’s been up to while we’ve been away? Here’s a peek at the first chapter of Bleed And Seek, available on Amazon: http://amzn.to/2xxwmIB.

 

“Make sure the jet’s ready to go and I need those pictures on my phone by the time I land in Paris,” Lavender said as he stepped into an elevator at the Park Lane Four Seasons. He pretended to see a scuff on the toe of his shoe as he turned away from the camera.

“The jet’s waiting and a car will pick you up at the west exit,” Denver said and Lavender’s eyes narrowed at the sound of gunfire in the background.

“I hope I’m not catching you at an inconvenient time. Would you like to call me when you’re done with your game?” He asked as he rubbed the top of his shoe against his calf.

“No, I’m cool. I see eight men. Six in the living slash dining room and two in the bedroom. The two in the back appear to be fighting,” Denver said absently and Lavender rolled his eyes as he ended the call. He pushed the phone into his back pocket as the doors opened. He stepped into the hall and pulled his gloves from his pocket and tugged them on as he slowly made his way toward the Blue Suite. Lavender hummed softly and his brows pulled together as he tried to recall the name of the piece.

“We were just there last night,” he complained as he mentally replayed the scene from the opera in his head then waved it off before he tapped his knuckles on the suite’s door.

He reached into his coat and pulled two guns from his holster just as the door opened. A large black man’s eyes widened in shock as Lavender pulled the triggers and two red stains spread across his chest. Lavender kicked the door wide then grabbed the front of the man’s shirt as he swayed and hid behind him as he aimed over his shoulder and took down a large Syrian behind the bar. Two bullets punched Lavender’s body shield as he put a round between the eyes of a shorter Syrian by the window and the glass cracked behind him as he slid to the floor.

Lavender pushed the body away then spun around a wall, into a small alcove. He glanced at his watch and nodded. He was making good time. One of the bodyguards ran behind the bar and ducked just as Lavender shot out the lamp and shattered the large mirror at the back of the bar. The glass spilled down the wall and demolished the bottles, decanters and glasses. Lavender tilted away as bullets pelted the molding next to his head then set the guns on the desk and reached for a newspaper. A headline caught his eye for a moment and he smirked before he crumpled it in his fist then reached into his pocket for a lighter. Lavender lit the ball of paper and gave it a moment to catch before he tossed it at the bar. A second later, there was a loud poof! as flames spread across the bar and up the wall. The last two bodyguards jumped from behind the couch and ran for the door as Lavender reached for his guns. He stepped out of the alcove and shot one guard through the temple and the other twice, between the shoulder blades then dropped the guns.

The bodyguard behind the bar screamed in Levantine Arabic and flames spread up his side as he ran at Lavender. He pulled a gun from behind his back and shot the guard between the eyes as he grabbed the front of his jacket. It took four shots to get the door to the bedroom to open and Lavender’s face and hand were uncomfortably hot by the time he was able to throw his human Molotov cocktail into the room. A man yelled in horror and Lavender’s arm swung toward him as he hurried into the room. He found his target as he pulled the other gun from behind his back.

“Please!” Omar al-Otari cried as he dropped his gun and held up his hands. Lavender’s eyes swept to the other person in the room and his finger relaxed on the trigger.

“Put on your clothes,” Lavender said calmly to the girl weeping and cowering in the corner. Her face was battered and bloody and her body was covered in bruises and scratches.

“You can take her if you want her and I’ll pay you whatev…” Otari’s eyes crossed and his mouth drooped as a bullet passed through his forehead and his brain sprayed the curtain behind him.

“I’m not interested,” Lavender said as he tossed the guns on the bed then reached into his coat and removed his wallet. He grabbed all the paper money in the billfold as the girl threw herself at him. Lavender held her off as he pushed the money at her. “I didn’t come to rescue you. Take this and forget you saw me,” he said as he gave her a severe look. She nodded then bolted from the room. Lavender grabbed the laptop off the table and put it in the small refrigerator as he quickly backed out of the room so it wouldn’t be damaged by the sprinklers. He turned and edged around the flames engulfing the bar then looked up as the fire alarms shrieked. Lavender slipped into the hall and dashed to the nearest stairwell just before the hallway filled with curious and panicked guests. He jogged down the steps to the next landing and hid behind the door just as it was pushed open and people spilled past him and down the stairs. He held it open and waved for people to hurry then followed the last person down. Everyone remained relatively calm and Lavender gripped an elderly man’s shoulder reassuringly as they waited at the exit to the west parking lot. “We’re just about out,” he said soothingly and the man nodded as he craned his neck to see around the people ahead of them.

Once outside, Lavender pretended to be concerned until they found the man’s son then waved farewell before he turned and hurried around a large cluster of irritated guests and into the open door of a Bentley. The door shut and the driver pulled away from the curb a moment later. Lavender lowered the window and tossed out his gloves then pulled his phone from his back pocket. He muttered a curse as he dialed Denver then rolled his eyes as he waited through several rings.

“Looks like everything went well. The fire was a nice touch,” he said and Lavender snorted.

“There were seven men,” he said sharply.

“Huh?” Denver grunted.

“Seven men and one very young woman. I’m not even sure she was of legal age,” Lavender clarified and the line was silent for several moments. “Reginald would have known,” he scolded.

“Still eight, though,” Denver said dismissively and Lavender’s tongue pressed against the inside of his cheek.

“You’re to make it completely and extremely clear that I am not considering any new jobs and you’re just holding down the fort until Reginald returns,” he said and Denver sighed.

“That’s such a waste, sir,” he complained and Lavender shook his head as he checked his watch again. He needed to board that jet in thirty minutes. Lavender checked the traffic and relaxed, everything looked like it was moving along.

“Any word on the fire?” He asked and Denver hummed under his breath as he checked.

“Looks like the sprinklers and staff handled it and no one was injured. I mean, aside from Otari and his crew,” he said and Lavender tugged at his sleeves as he sat back.

“Good. I don’t want you to take this the wrong way but if you ever call me in the middle of the night for anything unrelated to mine or my husband’s life and death, I will drown you in your own blood,” he said nonchalantly and Denver was silent for several moments. It was long enough for Lavender to imagine hog tying him then putting him face down in a bathtub.

“Sorry. But the United States thanks you for your assistance in the War On Terror. The money was just deposited into your account,” he said cheerfully and Lavender stifled a yawn. The new “temp” Reginald recommended was a nightmare. He was an American and a former intel analyst. He was gifted but lacked Reginald’s breeding, restraint and attention to detail. For all of Reginald’s many faults, he understood Lavender’s needs and knew just how much he could get away with.

“You’re not to call me, Denver. I don’t care how big the job is or who it’s for. If you call me again and make my husband ask questions, I’ll kill you slowly.”

“Got it, boss,” Denver said. “It looks like you’re running on time. You’ve got a fresh suit in the jet and your dinner reservations are for 9:00. I watched Rose’s live feed, she enjoyed her walk and is snoring like a chainsaw,” he added and Lavender nodded.

“That’s all for now. I’ll call you if I need anything,” he said then ended the call. “I never thought I’d miss Reginald,” he muttered as he searched the internet for the newspaper article he spotted earlier. He sighed and glanced out the window as he waited for a flash of guilt to pass. It was the third job in eight months. He was able to keep his nose clean for fourteen months after Petrovich then fell off the wagon while in Italy with Sage. While Lavender didn’t miss taking lives, he missed the act of taking lives terribly. The preparation and planning, the feel of his guns in his hands, matching his reflexes and skill against his opponent’s, the steadying of his nerves and the sharpening of his focus as he took out his target. It was all of that and a lot of fucking adrenaline. It was everything his otherwise perfect life lacked so every job felt like an act of infidelity. “This is the last time,” he insisted under his breath as he turned his attention back to his phone.

Less than three hours later, Lavender jogged up the steps toward the Musée d’Orsay and Sage waved before he hurried toward him.

“How was the Degas exhibit?” He asked as he caught Sage and pulled him close.

“Amazing. It’s Thursday night, they’re open late. We can run in and take a lap,” Sage offered and Lavender shook his head as their lips brushed.

“We can try and squeeze it in tomorrow before we leave but we’ve got dinner reservations and we’ll never make it to Hexagone if we don’t leave now,” he said and Sage gasped.

“You’re so amazing!” He declared as they made their way down the steps and the driver rushed around the car and opened the door.

“I didn’t get to spend the first half of the evening with you, I want to make sure the rest of the night is special,” Lavender said and Sage glared teasingly.

“We came to Paris because you needed to meet with your textile suppliers, not so you could spoil me,” he argued as he ducked into the backseat. Lavender offered the driver a nod before he lowered then slid onto the seat next to him.

“I’m allowed to do both,” he said as he reclined and pulled Sage so he was resting against his chest. “Tell me what you think of these patterns, I’m having a hard time making up my mind,” Lavender said as he swiped at his phone’s screen and found pictures of numerous fabric samples.

 

Bleed And Seek is here and my boys of Lake Cliff are waiting for you. Go get them.

 

http://amzn.to/2xxwmIB

LLSeries

New! Lavender’s Back And He’s Gayer And More Dangerous Than Ever.

#30 Is Coming. Your Favorite Gay Assassin Is Back And Worse Than Ever.

Aiden7:26

We’re getting closer, my lovely Perverts! #30 is almost ready for editing and I’m so damn excited. I thought I’d give you a peek at the first chapter because I know we’re all wondering what Lavender’s been up to while we’ve been away. We don’t have a title and we’re still a few weeks from being presentable but you know how much I hate keeping secrets. Here’s your excerpt, go get your man:

“Make sure the jet’s ready to go and I need those pictures on my phone by the time I land in Paris,” Lavender said as he stepped into an elevator at the Park Lane Four Seasons. He pretended to see a scuff on the toe of his shoe as he turned away from the camera.

“The jet’s waiting and a car will pick you up at the west exit,” Denver said and Lavender’s eyes narrowed at the sound of gunfire in the background.

“I hope I’m not catching you at an inconvenient time. Would you like to call me when you’re done with your game?” He asked as he rubbed the top of his shoe against his calf.

“No, I’m cool. I see eight men. Six in the living slash dining room and two in the bedroom. The two in the back appear to be fighting,” Denver said absently and Lavender rolled his eyes as he ended the call. He pushed the phone into his back pocket as the doors opened. He stepped into the hall and pulled his gloves from his pocket and tugged them on as he slowly made his way toward the Blue Suite. Lavender hummed softly and his brows pulled together as he tried to recall the name of the piece.

“We were just there last night,” he complained as he mentally replayed the scene from the opera in his head then waved it off before he tapped his knuckles on the suite’s door.

He reached into his coat and pulled two guns from his holster just as the door opened. A large black man’s eyes widened in shock as Lavender pulled the triggers and two red stains spread across his chest. Lavender kicked the door wide then grabbed the front of the man’s shirt as he swayed and hid behind him as he aimed over his shoulder and took down a large Syrian behind the bar. Two bullets punched Lavender’s body shield as he put a round between the eyes of a shorter Syrian by the window and the glass cracked behind him as he slid to the floor.

Lavender pushed the body away then spun around a wall, into a small alcove. He glanced at his watch and nodded. He was making good time. One of the bodyguards ran behind the bar and ducked just as Lavender shot out the lamp and shattered the large mirror at the back of the bar. The glass spilled down the wall and demolished the bottles, decanters and glasses. Lavender tilted away as bullets pelted the molding next to his head then set the guns on the desk and reached for the newspaper. A headline caught his eye for a moment and he smirked before he crumpled it in his fist then reached into his pocket for a lighter. Lavender lit the ball of paper and gave it a moment to catch before he tossed it at the bar. A second later, there was a loud poof! as flames spread across the bar and up the wall. The last two bodyguards jumped from behind the couch and ran for the door as Lavender reached for his guns. He stepped out of the alcove and shot one guard through the temple and the other twice, between the shoulder blades then dropped the guns.

The bodyguard behind the bar screamed in Levantine Arabic and flames spread up his side as he ran at Lavender. He pulled a gun from behind his back and shot the guard between the eyes as he grabbed the front of his jacket. It took four shots to get the door to the bedroom to open and Lavender’s face and hand were uncomfortably hot by the time he was able to throw his human Molotov cocktail into the room. A man yelled in horror and Lavender’s arm swung toward him as he hurried into the room. He found his target as he pulled the other gun from behind his back.

“Please!” Omar al-Otari cried as he dropped his gun and held up his hands. Lavender’s eyes swept to the other person in the room and his finger relaxed on the trigger.

“Put on your clothes,” Lavender said calmly to the girl weeping and cowering in the corner. Her face was battered and bloody and her body was covered in bruises and scratches.

“You can take her if you want her and I’ll pay you whatev…” Otari’s eyes crossed and his mouth drooped as a bullet passed through his forehead and his brain sprayed the curtain behind him.

“I’m not interested,” Lavender said as he tossed the guns on the bed then reached into his coat and removed his wallet. He grabbed all the paper money in the billfold as the girl threw herself at him. Lavender held her off as he pushed the money at her. “I didn’t come to rescue you. Take this and forget you saw me,” he said as he gave her a severe look. She nodded then bolted from the room. Lavender grabbed the laptop off the table and put it in the small refrigerator as he quickly backed out of the room so it wouldn’t be damaged by the sprinklers. He turned and edged around the flames engulfing the bar then looked up as the fire alarms shrieked. Lavender slipped into the hall and dashed to the nearest stairwell just before the hallway filled with curious and panicked guests. He jogged down the steps to the next landing and hid behind the door just as it was pushed open and people spilled past him and down the stairs. He held it open and waved for people to hurry then followed the last person down. Everyone remained relatively calm and Lavender gripped an elderly man’s shoulder reassuringly as they waited at the exit to the west parking lot. “We’re just about out,” he said soothingly and the man nodded as he craned his neck to see around the people ahead of them.

Once outside, Lavender pretended to be concerned until they found the man’s son then waved farewell before he turned and hurried around a large cluster of irritated guests and into the open door of a Bentley. The door shut and the driver pulled away from the curb a moment later. Lavender lowered the window and tossed out his gloves then pulled his phone from his back pocket. He muttered a curse as he dialed Denver then rolled his eyes as he waited through several rings.

“Looks like everything went well. The fire was a nice touch,” he said and Lavender snorted.

“There were seven men,” he said sharply.

“Huh?” Denver grunted.

“Seven men and one very young woman. I’m not even sure she was of legal age,” Lavender clarified and the line was silent for several moments. “Reginald would have known,” he scolded.

“Still eight, though,” Denver said dismissively and Lavender’s tongue pressed against the inside of his cheek.

“You’re to make it completely and extremely clear that I am not considering any new jobs and you’re just holding down the fort until Reginald returns,” he said and Denver sighed.

“That’s such a waste, sir,” he complained and Lavender shook his head as he checked his watch again. He needed to board that jet in thirty minutes. Lavender checked the traffic and relaxed, everything looked like it was moving along.

“Any word on the fire?” He asked and Denver hummed under his breath as he checked.

“Looks like the sprinklers and staff handled it and no one was injured. I mean, aside from Otari and his crew,” he said and Lavender tugged at his sleeves as he sat back.

“Good. I don’t want you to take this the wrong way but if you ever call me in the middle of the night for anything unrelated to mine or my husband’s life and death, I will drown you in your own blood,” he said nonchalantly and Denver was silent for several moments. It was long enough for Lavender to imagine hog tying him then putting him face down in a bathtub.

“Sorry. But the United States thanks you for your assistance in the War On Terror. The money was just deposited into your account,” he said cheerfully and Lavender stifled a yawn. The new “temp” Reginald recommended was a nightmare. He was an American and a former intel analyst. He was gifted but lacked Reginald’s breeding, restraint and attention to detail. For all of Reginald’s many faults, he understood Lavender’s needs and knew just how much he could get away with.

“You’re not to call me, Denver. I don’t care how big the job is or who it’s for. If you call me again and make my husband ask questions, I’ll kill you slowly.”

“Got it, boss,” Denver said. “It looks like you’re running on time. You’ve got a fresh suit in the jet and your dinner reservations are for 9:00. I watched Rose’s live feed and she enjoyed her walk and is snoring like a chainsaw,” he added and Lavender nodded.

“That’s all for now. I’ll call you if I need anything,” he said then ended the call. “I never thought I’d miss Reginald,” he muttered as he searched the internet for the newspaper article he spotted earlier. He sighed and glanced out the window as he waited for a flash of guilt to pass. It was the third job in eight months. He was able to keep his nose clean for fourteen months after Petrovich then fell off the wagon while in Italy with Sage. While Lavender didn’t miss taking lives, he missed the act of taking lives terribly. The preparation and planning, the feel of his guns in his hands, matching his reflexes and skill against his opponent’s, the steadying of his nerves and the sharpening of his focus as he took out his target. It was all of that and lot of fucking adrenaline. It was everything his otherwise perfect life lacked so every job felt like an act of infidelity. “This is the last time,” he insisted under his breath as he turned his attention back to his phone.

Less than three hours later, Lavender jogged up the steps toward the Musée d’Orsay and Sage waved before he hurried toward him.

“How was the Degas exhibit?” He asked as he caught Sage and pulled him close.

“Amazing. It’s Thursday night, they’re open late. We can run in and take a lap,” Sage offered and Lavender shook his head as their lips brushed.

“We can try and squeeze it in tomorrow before we leave but we’ve got dinner reservations and we’ll never make it to Hexagone if we don’t leave now,” he said and Sage gasped.

“You’re so amazing!” He declared as they made their way down the steps and the driver rushed around the car and opened the door.

“I didn’t get to spend the first half of the evening with you so I want to make sure the rest of the night is special,” Lavender said and Sage glared teasingly.

“We came to Paris because you needed to meet with your textile suppliers, not so you could spoil me,” he argued as he ducked into the backseat. Lavender offered the driver a nod before he lowered then slid onto the seat next to him.

“I’m allowed to do both,” he said as he reclined and pulled Sage so he was resting against his chest. “Tell me what you think of these patterns, I’m having a hard time making up my mind,” Lavender said as he swiped at his phone’s screen and found pictures of numerous fabric samples.

 

 

 

There’s time for you to catch up! You can find Lavender and the rest of my Lake Cliff boys on Amazon!:

http://amzn.to/2vlWAva

#30 Is Coming. Your Favorite Gay Assassin Is Back And Worse Than Ever.

New Covers And New News!

Hello, my Pervy Loves! I’ve got great news and I’m making some big changes. First, we’re slowly moving my titles to Nook and iBooks. I’ve started with Hide And Keep, for reasons.  My new titles will still be released on Amazon and through Kindle Unlimited. After the 90 day exclusivity agreement expires, I’ll release each title on Nook and iBooks as well. They won’t be available on KU after that but you’ll still be able to purchase it on all three sites. I’m hoping this will make it easier for readers to find and enjoy my books. I also decided it was time to give the whole series a facelift since we’re about to turn 30.

LLSeries

Obviously, I’m several years older than 30 and I’ve only been publishing for almost three years. I am about to publish book #30 and it’s going to be very special. Here’s a hint:

AidenJ17

New Covers And New News!

A New Book And A Free Dirty Chapter!

Available on Amazon now!

http://amzn.to/2tvRRYn

* Very Adult Excerpt Ahead. Be At Least 18, A Fan Of Swear Words, Sex & Cows*

Brightest3

 

“Are we there yet?” Haiden asked and Cash gave him a flat look.

“You just asked me that two minutes ago,” he said and Haiden held his hands up.

“You said we were just driving to the other end of the property. We’ve been crawling over hills and winding around trees for almost half an hour. I’m starting to feel a little queasy,” he admitted and Cash reached for his thigh and rubbed it.

“I’ve got almost four thousand acres, it’s like fifty miles across as the crow flies so it takes a while. Just a few more minutes. And I’m sorry you have the stomach of an infant,” he teased.

“Have you thought about adding more roads?” Haiden asked and Cash nodded.

“We’re working on a four lane highway, right through the middle,” he said sarcastically as he pointed out the windshield. “We’re here,” he added and Haiden became alert as he sat up.

“Wow.” He waited until Cash stopped to jump out. A large tree created a canopy next to a soft bend in the river and they were surrounded by wildflowers and butterflies. The grass was deep and thick and Haiden quickly kicked off his shoes and gasped as his toes sank into cool, damp, softness.

“Here,” Cash said and Haiden turned and caught a thick plaid blanket. He looked to where Cash pointed then nodded before he headed for the flat spot beneath the tree. He spread the blanket and dropped onto it as Cash reached into the back of the truck. He pulled out a bottle of wine and a rope and Haiden’s brows rose as Cash headed for the river. He tied the rope around the bottle and slowly lowered it into the water. He tossed the rope over a low hanging tree branch and knotted it loosely before he went back to the truck for a basket.

“This is amazing. I think I could live right here,” Haiden said and he looked around as Cash dropped his hat on the blanket then pulled his shirt over his head and tossed it at the truck. He lowered onto the blanket and stretched out next to Haiden.

“Really? Even with the treacherous drive and the motion sickness?” He asked as he folded his arm behind his head then rested his hat on his face. Haiden stuck out his tongue then jumped as a cow wandered into the clearing.

“Cash!” He hissed and Cash pushed the brim of his hat back. Haiden pointed urgently at the cow as it ambled closer. “There’s a cow!” He whispered loudly and Cash chuckled as he let his hat drop.

“I have 2,742, the last time I counted,” he muttered and Haiden watched in stunned awe as the cow slowly lowered next to Cash and its legs folded under it. Cash reached out and patted its side. “It’s a beautiful day for a nap, isn’t it, girl?” The cow made a content snuffling sound as it shut its eyes and Haiden shook his head in disbelief before he reached into his back pocket and pulled out his phone.

“There’s no signal here either,” he muttered then dropped it on the blanket. “What are we supposed to do?” He asked and he could see Cash’s lips curve under his hat.

“Take a nap, eat, drink wine, fuck, pick flowers… Do whatever you want,” he said and Haiden’s brows rose as he craned his neck and looked around them.

“We can do that here? No one’s going to come looking for her?” He asked as he eyed the cow warily and Cash shook his head.

“They’re all down at the ranch, cleaning the facilities today. The cows and I get the day off,” he said and Haiden bit his lip.

“I didn’t bring anything,” he pouted and Cash’s hand shot out and twisted in the front of Haiden’s shirt before he was pulled on top of him. He gripped Haiden’s thighs as he settled them outside his hips and he was hard as he bucked beneath him lazily. Need and euphoric happiness washed over Haiden as Cash took off his hat and dropped it on his head.

“Everything’s in the basket,” he murmured as he flicked the button at his fly free and Haiden gasped as he fell forward and sucked on Cash’s lip.

“I think I love it here,” he purred as Cash’s large hands slid under his shirt and spread across his back. There was warmth and joy but Haiden reveled in how peaceful and safe he felt as he rocked against Cash, letting their anticipation and desire build. After so many years of fortifying himself and pretending to be stronger than he really was, he could finally just exist and feel. Cash was a large rock in the center of the raging storm. Haiden could take shelter from the chaos of his life and he didn’t have to hide from himself when he was with Cash. Life was simple and clean and Haiden was perfect just the way he was.

Sex stopped being a distraction or a way for him to gain more “street cred” as a celebrity slut. There had been so many men but they were all a muddled blur in the back of Haiden’s brain. Somehow, everything felt new and thrilling each time Haiden kissed Cash and every touch glowed with reverence and discovery. Haiden couldn’t remember the last time sex felt honestly good or real before Cash, he couldn’t remember the last time he felt truly aroused or anticipated someone’s touch. With Cash, his body vibrated with need and exhilaration. He craved his hands, lips, skin, cock… Just all of him, really. And the feelings were more intoxicating than any drug or drink. They were so brilliant and intense, Haiden wouldn’t dream of smoking or snorting anything that might dull or distract him from the giddy flutter in his stomach or the way Cash could cover him in goosebumps with just a brush of his lips against his skin.

“How are you real?” Haiden murmured and he felt Cash’s lips curve beneath his.

“I’m not completely convinced this isn’t a dream,” he said and Haiden groaned as Cash gripped his ass and rocked his hips. He was hard and so large and Haiden shivered as desire and delight skipped down his spine and a gnawing ache flared in his passage.

“Were you serious about fucking out here?” He asked and Cash hummed as he reached into the basket. He searched for a moment and Haiden’s nerves sparked when he produced a bottle of lube and a strip of condoms.

“We’ve got all afternoon, knock yourself out,” he said lazily as he dropped them on his chest and folded his arms behind his head. He shut his eyes and a deep, rumbling, contented sigh spilled from him and Haiden knew he was ruined. No man would ever make him tremble with need or be as captivating as Cash.

“I’m going to need more than an afternoon,” he said as he slid lower and rubbed his lips and face all over Cash’s chest as he unzipped their jeans.

He quickly shimmied out of his then tugged at the waist of Cash’s jeans as he lifted his hips. There was another lazy growl as Cash pushed Haiden’s shirt up his chest then pulled it over his head. His hands gripped and caressed possessively as Haiden licked and panted at the hard ridges and grooves of his pecs and abs as he made his way down Cash’s body. He couldn’t imagine a man being more potent and powerful or more gentle and protective than Cash and he vowed he’d do anything to keep him as he settled on his knees between his thighs. Haiden was demanding and thorough as he licked, sucked and swallowed as much of Cash’s heavy, pulsing length and essence as he could. He waited until Cash’s control vanished and he was lifted and seated, straddling his hips.

“I’ll give you all the time in the world but you need to get on up and ride me now,” he drawled and Haiden’s hands shook as he ripped open a condom.

There wasn’t a man alive who could do that better than Cash. Haiden quickly stretched the condom down his shaft the coated it generously with lube. He rose on his knees and hissed as he pushed his slick fingers into his hole. He fingered himself until the stinging passed and his passage relaxed and tingled hungrily. Cash groaned as his hands washed over his skin, tenderly worshiping him as he chanted his name. Haiden shut his eyes so Cash wouldn’t see them shimmer as awe and joy swelled within him. He positioned the head of Cash’s erection at his entrance then slowly sat, taking him into his tightness as his head fell back.

He opened his eyes and the vivid blue sky peeked through the leaves and he was in heaven. Cash’s hands locked around his hips as he bucked beneath him. Pleasure and heat burst beneath his skin as he took Cash deep and ground hard, striking his prostate as he clenched tight.

“That’s it,” Cash crooned gently as he pulled and pushed Haiden’s hips in time with his thrusts. “Ride my dick and come for me,” he said and Haiden nodded drunkenly as he rocked harder and faster. Cash’s hand tightened around Haiden’s shaft and stroked firmly. His body became tight, hot and frantic as pleasure and pressure bloomed in his ass and groin as his skin glistened with sweat.

“Don’t stop!” He begged as everything became brighter and his body flickered and glowed. He rolled his hips and bounced, thrilling at the euphoric heat and tangling of his nerves as his ass slapped against Cash’s pelvis relentlessly. His prostate throbbed and pressure pushed into the base of his cock as his passage squeezed. “Oh, fuck, that’s it,” he breathed as his body locked and his eyes rolled. Cash sat up and his lips crushed Haiden’s as he pulled him onto his thick, pulsing erection. Haiden screamed against his tongue as his body shattered and Cash’s fingers dug into his back and ass as he came with a loud, primal roar. Their chests heaved as they lapped and sucked at each other’s lips blindly and deliriously before Cash fell back on the blanket. “You mentioned wine and a nap?” Haiden said as he landed on Cash’s chest and it shook as he laughed. His arms tightened around Haiden as they rolled and Cash’s lips tugged at Haiden’s teasingly before he carefully pulled out.

“I never thought I’d see the day,” he said as he pushed off the ground and got to his knees. “I didn’t think you were capable of taking a nap,” he added as he hopped to his feet and reached for the rope. Haiden stretched and let his arms fall on the blanket, over his head and smiled dreamily at the swaying leaves and perfect blue sky above him.

“After that and a few glasses of wine, I doubt I’ll have a choice,” he said as Cash pulled the wine from the water and returned to the blanket.

“We’ll go for a swim once the heat gets to us. It’ll feel like heaven when we get out,” he said as he sat and hunted in the basket. He produced two plastic wine glasses and a bottle opener and Haiden shifted his shoulders and wiggled so he could rest his head on Cash’s thigh.

“This already feels like heaven,” Haiden said and Cash paused and his face became softer.

“It does,” he agreed as his hand cradled Haiden’s cheek. “We used to come here often but I forgot about it as Natalie got older and wanted to spend less time with me. It’s been a long time since I felt this happy,” he whispered and Haiden almost giggled as ecstatic joy swept through him but he caught a flash of grief in Cash’s gaze.

“What’s wrong?” He asked as he reached and brushed the hair away from Cash’s eyes. He smiled as he shook his head and it was gone.

“I’m just really happy, Haiden,” he said softly then traced his lips tenderly before he picked up a glass and poured. Haiden wanted to believe him but he could feel the change in Cash. He immediately worried it was Gretchen but he wasn’t sure if he had a right to ask so he nodded and let the matter rest as he took his glass.

“Even power bottoms need power naps now and then,” he said as he raised his glass in salute then sipped.

A New Book And A Free Dirty Chapter!

The Scared Girl’s Guide To Butt Sex

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      One of the things I love most about writing gay erotica is the trust people automatically bestow upon me. They’ll share something about their sexuality, past or relationships they typically wouldn’t with other strangers. And for whatever reason, the conversation often finds its way to anal sex. “Does anyone actually enjoy anal?” I get this question a lot. Mostly from straight women in their thirties. Though I have passed along a few tips to a gay friend or two along the way. If you’re a woman, you probably don’t need me to explain why we’re all so terrified when it comes to anal sex. We’ve all had pretty much the same experiences. We all got here on the same bus. Or, maybe you’ve managed to keep that hatch sealed. Or, you’re a dude. It’s ok, you can hang out too.

      A lot of my female friends and acquaintances don’t actually know any gay men, personally. Sadly, for them, I’m the closet thing they’ve got to a gay man. I do my best, guys. But I can’t tell you how many times someone has confided that they “Just don’t get how gay men can do it!”, before they shudder on their behalf. If they’re Catholic, they might even cross themselves. “Um… Correctly?” is usually my response. I understand that they’re not shaming gay men for having anal sex. They’re pitying them. I tell them they’ve been doing it wrong.

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      For most of us, our attitudes toward anal sex are formed from two experiences.

Experience #1:

      You’re twenty or twenty-one and you’ve had the night of your life at your sorority’s mixer. You literally drank your face off and Chad finally noticed you. His dick game is strong. He doesn’t lay on you like a stolen corpse and he took notes during the foreplay parts of his favorite porn clips. Maybe you smoked a joint and actually inhaled but you’re feeling DIRTY. You give him the good head, where your nose runs all over the place and your mascara slides down your cheeks as he punches your tonsils. He senses the mood is right and asks if you’re into “butt stuff”. Normally, you’d call his mom and tell her she raised a serial killer but not tonight. Tonight, you’re breaking your father’s heart. Tonight, you’re the girl of Chad’s dreams. Tomorrow, there’s going to be a 1:32 video on Pornhub titled “Tinder slut takes anal like a pro” and you kind of know about it and you’re not mad at it. Somehow, he slides in and it’s nowhere near as bad as you thought it would be. You thought it was going to hurt so bad you’d never want to poop again. But it’s good. This is when you’re possessed by a demon and you let him ride you around his dorm room like a pogo stick. The sex is amazing. You come so hard one of your fillings falls out and you swallow it.

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Experience #2:

      You’re in your early thirties. Chad might have told his frat brothers about the night you let him stovepipe you. After that, you installed a security alarm on your emergency exit so you wouldn’t develop a reputation. You still think about that night when you masturbate but you’ve never felt comfortable or been drunk enough with any of the men you’ve dated to dip your toes back in that pond. Until tonight. Ted’s The One. Maybe he’s proposing tonight, I don’t know. But you’ve decided it’s time to rock his world and show him you’re the woman he can take home to mom but also the freak he’s going to tell his racquetball buddies about. He won’t though. He doesn’t brag about you when he’s with his homeboys. He talks about how some other woman’s nipples pushed through her shirt when she handed him his coffee. Anyways. You’re wearing heels and dress that only looks good on you if you keep your stomach sucked in and walk with your tits two feet in front of you. You’re having dinner at one of those nice restaurants where your server talks softly instead of throwing peanuts at you and line dancing on the table. You order the fettuccine alfredo because you forgot that you can’t really tolerate dairy anymore. Who cares? Tonight’s going to be special. Butter, cheese and heavy cream are no match for Romance. Two hours later, you’re back in your junior suite at The Radisson and you’ve had like six cosmos. You’re not feeling 100% but you’ve hinted that tonight’s going to be extra special and you can’t back out now. He brought luuuuube. You’re locked in so you have to make it work.

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You’ve told Ted all about your wild night in college. He probably asks you to describe it in detail every time he’s coming around third and sprinting toward home plate. Ted knows what’s on the itinerary and he’s stepped up his game too. He plays Enya and puts on a diving cap and nose plugs then motorboats your clit while you hiss and cringe in agony. Then, it’s time. He settles over you after he’s slapped a palmful of KY on himself and you hold your breath. It’s not good. Actually, it’s about as bad as a thing can get without requiring an ambulance. It feels like you’re trying to sit on a hot road cone and you’re pretty sure you’re going to have to sneak the sheets out of the hotel. The engagement’s probably off.

       That’s pretty much the end of it. Anal is forever off the table and if Ted so much as mentions it again, you’re going to counseling. But it doesn’t have to be. If you’ve watched any porn on your own, you’ve seen plenty of women and men having an absolute blast as a rubber fist is jammed into their backside. Obviously, it works for some people. What are we doing wrong?

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1. Stop treating your ass like it’s church. Visit more than twice a year and forget about dressing up. Your fifth anniversary is not the night to kick in the door and take hostages. Why are straight married people so set on making anal sex romantic? In our house, we have Wu-Tang Tuesdays. Not that we only have anal sex on Tuesdays. It’s just fun and easier to make that a standing appointment because I get a little more haphazard with my diet toward the weekend. But whenever we do it, we don’t listen to Bolero or John Legend. We listen to Wu-Tang, Jack White or something we wouldn’t let the kids listen to when they were toddlers. Listen to something with swear words, you’re going to say a lot of them.

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2. Accept that you have a digestive track and respect it. Back when you were in college you lived on clear alcohols and Diet Pepsi and you definitely didn’t eat on Saturdays because you didn’t want to look “bloat-ie” in your low rise bootcut jeans. You didn’t give a fuck about fiber. You were like a field of fresh snow when you went for it with Chad. I usually cut out most dairy and meat at the beginning of the week and eat more vegetables and lentils and drink a kale-based green juice for breakfast a few times a week. I read a magazine article about a woman who let her boyfriend pressure her into spontaneous anal because she thought he was about to propose. Things got messy and he broke up with her. I’m not kidding. The first thing everyone has to agree to and accept is that butts aren’t just for fun, they’re functional. And if you’re going to do adult things to your butt, everyone involved should be adult enough to understand there might be consequences.

3. Avoid the consequences. This is where so many straight women sabotage themselves. They’d do well to pay a little more attention to porn or consult the internet for advice. Anal sex is infinitely more enjoyable when you’re squeaky clean. It takes about 75% of the worry out of it and lets you focus on more important things. Like remembering to wear waterproof mascara and holding onto your ankles. There are a range of cleaning options. You can keep it simple and straightforward and buy a Fleet enema or you can get a little more niche and play with hot water bottles and hoses. I fall somewhere in between and like adding the tiniest bit of rose or peppermint scented castile soap.

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I also like to hedge my bets with an Immodium in the afternoon. Mind your electrolytes, though. I try to drink a few Powerades before and after cleansing because I hate fainting. Do your research first, or ask someone you trust for advice.

4. You should definitely go it alone, in the beginning. You probably knew your way around your vagina long before you let a boy or another girl touch it. Figure out your butt too. You’ll be more relaxed and less embarrassed if it’s just you. Also, he’ll think it’s sexy as fuck when you look like you know what you’re doing. Just casually strum your fingers over it while you’re masturbating and slowly add a finger or two back there to the routine. Be patient and keep it chill.

5. You ALWAYS use lube. And a lot of it. Unless you’ve ever wondered what it’s like to get a rug burn inside your ass or you just really like pain (which is fine, too), you should have plenty of an appropriate lubricant on hand. Look on Amazon and pay attention to what works with different toys and condoms, if you’re using them. I wouldn’t have anal sex without a lubricant with lidocaine in it, at least. Even if it’s just you, you’re going to want to get really slippery. I have four different types of lube in my toy drawer. I use a lot of coconut oil too.

6. S-T-R-E-T-C-H. You couldn’t feel your face or those vicious little muscles in your ass when you let Chad ride you to town and back. I will admit: I cheat. Nothing gets me in the mood for butt sex like pot. And pot makes butt sex a hell of a lot easier. Poppers are fun too but if you’re actually reading this for advice, you might want to hold off on those. Also, I keep a prescription strength bottle of viscous lidocaine in my toy drawer. I do not know the long-term side effects or dangers of using lidocaine rectally and advise you to proceed with caution. You could also ask your doctor if you’re fine with him judging you. I like to live dangerously so I go heavy on the lidocaine about fifteen minutes prior, after I’m so fresh and so clean, clean. But if you’re embarking on some light anal play or everyday anal sex, you’ll probably be fine without a prescription. Now, here’s what your gay friends would tell you, if you were brave enough to ask them: Stretching makes a huge difference. Spontaneous anal sex happens all the time and it’s really hot. It’s just not for us. Yet. Taking a little time to ease into it can take most of the pain out of anal. Unless you want it. You can just skip ahead, then. I pregame by gradually using a variety of different sized vibrators or dump them on the bed and we use them during foreplay. It’s a lot of fun and you won’t scream like you’re being murdered as he’s fighting his way in.

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And you don’t have to worry about breaking or wearing out your butt. For the most part, the ass is a lot like a vagina and will stretch and shrink back to normal shape after a few hours. Forget what your friends told you in high school, your lunch isn’t going to fall out. You can find some really impressive pictures of prolapsed anuses on the internet but a lot of time and diligence went into them. That rose didn’t bloom overnight. Not that you won’t want to be a little mindful, the day after. But you’ll be fine. I promise.

7. Try ALL the positions and get comfortable. There’s a sweet spot in there and you might have to pull a few muscles before you find it. But it’s super worth it. You don’t have to hug your knees and pray that it’s over quickly, watch a few videos or look on Pinterest for a Kama Sutra For Moms chart or something. The ideal positions would be ones you can really settle into and work. You’re not going to look hot while riding him reverse cowboy, if you’re doing it right. Just commit to sweating and swearing and whatever else works.

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8. Anal sex can happen at any time. Seriously. Stop saving it for birthdays and anniversaries. Many people have anal sex daily. They don’t need a special occasion, they just do it because it feels really good. But it takes a little practice and twice a year isn’t really cutting it, is it? And do you really want to make something you’re probably going to be awful at the focal point of your tenth anniversary?

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The Scared Girl’s Guide To Butt Sex